Friday January 8

Today has been a long day. It is after 11:00 pm and my day has been going non stop since about 2:30 pm this afternoon. I can not tell you everything I did today. Well I could... but I won't because if I repeat it then my body will go OMG... that is why I am tired. It is a psychological thing if that makes sense. Kind of tricking my body.

I am here at my parents house watching over my Mom. The girls are home with their
Dad. As I sit here alone this seems the opportune time to write this...

I have been reading the book by Joyce Meyer called "Battlefield Of The Mind." It was recommended by another home school Mom (Paula Brown... thank you Paula..love you girl! ) I highly recommend you read it! It has opened up doors for me in ways you can not imagine. I am not really good at speaking words and explaining things. When I am going through things I keep them to myself and usually do not tell unless I am asking for prayer so with the Holy Spirits help I will try to reveal what I have learned.

For the last 3 years (since the death of my sister,Sherrie) I have allowed the devil to get his foot in the door of my mind by allowing my thoughts to bring me into a deep state of depression. I have felt the weight of this in every aspect of my life. By not reigning in my thoughts I have not been able to listen for that still small voice and the Holy Spirit to lead me and give me victory and joy in my life.

After my sister died my Mother's health plummeted. Right now Mom is on a respirator and unable to do anything for herself. My Dad has been the primary care giver of my Mom since with my brother Rick's help. So on top of my sister's death then my Mom it has been a down hill slope for me since. The devil has told me that God was not listening or going to heal my Mom. I have seen so many miracles of healing in her life. Why now was there no healing were my thoughts. The devil had planted that seed of doubt in me. In order for faith to work you can not doubt. Until I read this book I could not see... it was like I had blinders on because emotions had been ruling my thoughts. As I began to read this book it was like my soul was starving and could not get enough. I think each chapter has brought tears to my eyes. It was like Jesus was talking to my heart because I could not find my way out of this valley I was in. If you have dealt with depression on any level please consider reading this book.

The day after Christmas my Dad had a stroke. So with my Dad in the hospital my brother and I take care of our Mom. It is very difficult to be in three places at once. At the hospital with Dad, help with my Mom so my brother can get rest and then take care of my own family. My husband and daughters have been a big help and I could not do this without them. We will get through this with Gods help. He is our strength and endurance. Good things are going to come from this! People are going to be blessed because God will be glorified in all this! Amazing things are on the horizon.